better use of time?

I am mind numbingly bored.

I am sitting at my desk at work and I am supposed to be calculating signal to noise values for the observations we'll be carrying out at SALT in the fall. Searching through papers from the 60s (since no one has deemed our objects interesting to look at since then since then) for flux values and continuum brightnesses, I have had the sobering realization that I actually don't give a shit about any of this stuff. I really don't care where the dust is in the Orion Nebula, and although vaguely interesting, will it ever change anyones life to know about magnetic fields in a planetary nebula?

Yesterday I actually went as far as to apply for a job. Its with McGraw-Hill, who amongst their many interests create, market and publish educational supplementary material like textbooks, work-kits and cdroms. I actually used some of their stuff in high school and liked it. The job is to help develop materials for K-12 math, science and spelling programs. It sounds really interesting, its creative and most importantly it will perhaps one day benefit a little kid somewhere.

I still don't really know why I applied.

The job is in, of all the ironic places, Columbus OH. I don't really think they'll even get in touch with me, or that I would have the balls to pack in the PhD and take the job should it ever come up. One question clearly requires answering though - why do I keep looking at the job pages, and why can't I get out of bed most mornings to come into the office and rack my brains all day over all this astronomy crap?